Snowflake or highly sensitive person?
How to improve your workplace collaboration with Generation Snowflake and Highly Sensitive People.
The older generation at work, team managers and leaders with snowflakes in their team have sincere difficulties cooperating with them as employees. They are more prone to burnout then others, deal with depression more, can’t handle criticism very well and have unreasonable demands.
The Snowflake Generation is used as a collective name for Generation Z and Millennials, younger people, but also, we also use the term "Snowflake" as a term for a person with an inflated sense of uniqueness, an unwarranted sense of entitlement, or overly emotional, easily offended, and unable to deal with opposing opinions. Also, Highly Sensitive People are often referred to as Snowflakes.
I do hear my mother in my head when I coach Highly Sensitive clients, like me, struggling with their well-being at work or going through burnout. She gets angry at me and tells me she doesn’t understand what I do at all.
Why do people need a coach? In her days they didn’t have all this nonsense about well-being at work and depression, coaches, or therapy. She sighs deeply and frustratingly says: ‘goodness me, I never had a problem in my life and worked for one employer for over 40 years without even a day sick. What is this burnout nonsense? This generation has it too good, that’s the problem, they are too spoiled, and I blame myself for this. We handed everything to you on a silver platter.’
My mother represents a whole older generation out there who is still at work and who secretly or not so secretly thinks the same thing.
There is a real gap between the younger and older generations especially at work. Older generations struggle big time trying to please the ever-growing demands of what they call a snowflake generation. Now often Highly Sensitive People somehow end up on this pile too. But don’t confuse the people who are Highly Sensitive, and have Sensory-Processing Sensitivity, which was extensively researched and published by Dr. Elaine Aaron. We are not snowflakes. We are talking about a difference in perspective from one generation to a younger one.
The older generation at work, team managers, and leaders with snowflakes in their team have sincere difficulties cooperating with them as employees. They are more prone to burnout than others, deal with depression more can’t handle criticism very well, and have unreasonable demands. The list goes on.
I bet you heard at least someone at work say one of the following phrases:
In our time we didn’t have coaches, therapy, or depression, we simply got on with things.
We didn’t have time for this.
Why are you in need of a coach anyway?
What is there to complain about?
What do you mean by mental health at work??
You need to be grateful to have a job, a roof over your head, and food on the table.
I don’t get this generation.
I simply can’t work with these people.
Now I am a bully? And they need a coach?
The generation snowflake, according to statistics and research studies, doesn’t seem to be coping very well with daily life’s challenges. They suffer far more from mental health issues than previous generations.
A lot has been said about the way younger generations have been raised compared to previous ones. The parents who raised their children after the war are significantly different than how we raise our children now. All adults at the workplace know there is a real generation clash.
I remember my client telling me that his father says he often got a good trashing as his father suffered big time from PTSD from the war. He didn’t do emotions like this very well and beat up his children regularly as if he were still in the war. His father, now a nearly retired senior manager, wasn’t allowed to show emotions like this and has a big difficulty dealing with younger more who show emotions freely.
The younger generations are motivated to show emotions more freely, as when they are suppressed or bottled up, we know now, is unhealthy, and can lead to depression or chronic health conditions. What a contrast already.
We can all agree that on a basic level, humans didn’t change all that much, it is our environment, period, society, how we grew up with what beliefs, and who raised us that makes the real difference.
Diverse research proves that younger generations have more depression and mental health issues than any other generation before us.
Younger generations feel more pressure than ever before to make the right decisions, and choose their purpose in life, not just a job, but a career. They can compare themself not just to their friends at school, but to their generation in the whole wide world.
There is constant pressure to be more and choose the right thing. Social media is working against them in this way.
Younger generations have more information to process through their brain than any other generation before them thanks to technology and the internet.
Both generations are right in this case.
Say what you will and think what you need to think about snowflakes, you still need to work with them, so how do we approach this?
How can we deal with this?
Here I share some strategies on how to build strong teams with snowflakes:
Change perspective -The first thing as a team leader is to try to change the perspective of this generation. Not everyone has had the same childhood as you have had, or opportunities or lack of. We are all different and somehow victims of our time. How would you have fared under the same pressures?
Communicate clearly- don’t leave anything to chance. Ask what they need from you to make them more comfortable. That doesn’t mean you need to give in a soft cushioned approach and roll over. That simply means that as an employee you can negotiate terms for their wellbeing so you can improve your team’s performance in the long run. What are your mutual benefits and how can you establish a middle ground?
Focus on your similarities and mutual goals - Sometimes an understanding will never come, and that is okay too. We are not here at work to please each other but to do our jobs. Can you put your differences aside and concentrate on your similarities instead?
Don’t take it personally – we are different and everyone in the team brings their own weakness and strengths with them. We have different beliefs and upbringings. Let it go and don’t take differences as a personal attack.
Seek to understand, don’t judge it – focus on understanding it from a different perspective. Try not to judge or label others as it only causes more conflict, misunderstanding, and confusion in the team. Stick to the work facts, collaborate, and ask for solutions.
I am Tineke Zoet, an ex-mariner, Maritime Professional, and certified professional life coach.
I am dedicated to helping organisations harness the talents and potential of every individual in their teams to receive a more collaborative and effective outcome.
In every team, there is a unique blend of diverse personalities. While high-achievers and confident extroverts tend to drive projects forward, it's essential not to overlook the strengths and perspectives of neurodivergent, introverted, and highly sensitive individuals.
It is my mission to help you harness the whole team’s talent by tapping into every individual’s own unique strength, including the overlooked, unseen potential of the quieter members of your team.
How can you foster collaboration and connection between these diverse personality types, enabling your teams to thrive harmoniously and leverage everyone's strengths?
Reach out to me to explore the possibilities of collaboration and discuss further details.
www.tinekezoet.com ; hello@tinekezoet.com
